Hoggle's Maid
by Danalas the Lady Chaos
Summary: A little Solstice day pranking leads Hoggle to getting a new maid for a day. Deals with the sock rumor. Sarah only makes a brief appearance.


Hoggle's Maid

Discliamer: I do not own Jareth, Hoggle, or anything else in the Underground. So there.

A/N: Deals with the sock rumour. *glares at evil spell check that won't let her spell American style* Sarah only makes a brief cameo appearance as judge of the prank contest. No romance, so if that's what you want, don't come here. 

To the untrained eye, Jareth was insane. He wasn't though. It was the Winter Solstice, and in the Underground, that meant pranks, since the Winter Solstice in the Underground is equal to April first in the Aboveground. And this year, the stakes were high. Jareth and Hoggle had a running bet for today as to who could prank whom the best by the end of the day.

This, of course, was why Jareth was currently hiding behind a bush just outside the walls to the Goblin City, giggling silently to himself, and watching in the window of Hoggle's bedroom. If Jareth won this pranking contest, Hoggle would have to swim across the Bog of Eternal Stench. If Jareth lost, however, it meant demeaning himself by dressing up as a French maid and being maid to Hoggle.

Naturally, Jareth did not want that to happen. Therefore, he had gotten a very early start. As soon as Hoggle sat up, the string tied to his nose would jerk down a large bucket of eggs all over the dwarf. This lack of weight would in turn release a large pillow that would, upon hitting Hoggle, release a flury of feathers.

The trap was simple. It was silly. And it was pure genius because the poor dwarf would not be expecting to be egged and feathered at 6 in the morning, even on the Winter Solstice when he had such a bet going on with the King of the Goblins with such high stakes. Each had only one chance, and Hoggle would not be expecting Jareth to use his chance so early.

That was what made the prank so perfect. It was a prank that was so perfect that only a King could pull it off. A Goblin King, that is. With one final laugh, Jareth headed back to the castle to shower and try on his new tights.

Inside, Hoggle laughed despite the egging and feathering he had just gotten. He knew damn well Jareth had just gotten new tights, and planned on breaking them in today after his morning shower. As a result, he had been in the castle in the wee hours of the morning. In Jareth's new tights, he had placed a powder that would have some very interesting results. 

An hour later, Jareth had showered, dressed with his usual flare, and just entered the throne room. The goblins stopped and stared. The rumours were true. Their King did use a sock, and, apparently, he had forgotten it this morning. Jareth arched one elegant eyebrow. "Well?" he asked. "What are you all staring at?" This, of course, was too much for the goblins, who all fell laughing. Looking himself over to see what was so funny, Jareth saw what had happened. His tights were now rather loose, his pride and joy having gone MIA. 

"HOGGLE!!" 

The dwarf could hear his name being cried out and slowly made his way to the castle, laughing all the way. "Don't worry, yer majesty," he said as he entered. "The effect of the powder's only temporary. You'll only need a roll of socks for the next week!" Jareth was fuming. He had to admit, though, that it was a rather good prank. It was time to go to the judge. 

A moment later, they were at Sarah's house, in her bedroom to be precise. Sarah, however, was still asleep. She had agreed to judge yesterday, when Jareth and Hoggle had told her about the bet and, especially, the stakes. Unfortunately, she obviously was not expecting them at 7:15 in the morning. So, picking the dwarf up, Jareth unceremoniously threw Hoggle onto Sarah's stomach. The dwarf landed with a thud, and Sarah awoke with a jerk. 

"Don't tell me you two finished your contest already…" she said, blinking away the blurriness in her eyes that came with being still sleepy. When it cleared, she had to blink again, sure she was seeing right. "Hoggle? Is that you under there?" The dwarf chuckled. "It's me, Sarah, But what I did to Jareth is much worse," he said. "Take a look." Sarah took one look at where her friend was pointing and started both blushing at having to look in THAT area, and laughing uncontrollably. 

"I can't believe it! It _IS _a sock!" she cried out, holding her stomach from laughing so hard. The Goblin King just sighed. "I assure you, Sarah, it isn't a sock, and as soon as the powder Hoggle used wears off, I plan on proving it to you over and over." This shut Sarah up quick, and she just blushed ferociously. "Hoggle still wins the contest, Jareth," she said. "And how convenient. I have a little French maid costume left over from the spring play," she said, sliding out of bed and heading over to her closet. It wasn't the most modest of costumes, either, and now, it was Jareth's turn to blush.

_Finis_


End file.
